For a year now I have kept a list of things my wife does and says that are really special. I get choked up when I review this list. I started it so that a) she knew how much I appreciated her, and b) I would have a reminder to myself of all the things (big and small) that make her wonderful. I plan on referring to this list (and expanding it) for years to come. If we ever face challenges in our marriages, this list will surely be a source of encouragement.
You'll notice it's slightly out of order. That's because I copied and pasted from 8 different lists that I kept (once I felt one list got too long, I started another one).
Perhaps you're reading this post looking for marriage advice. Well, I am sharing this mainly to brag about my wife. But her example stands out to spouses everywhere (including me) and it would be easily to glean great marriage ideas from my wife's example.
4/30/14 We had a fun time on Google hangouts (Google's version of Skype). It was like I came home for a minute even though I was at work (outside hallway).
5/15/14 Texts me everyday. I especially enjoy that she calls me and texts me during her lunch breaks. Usually she calls me cutie, sexy, honey, baby, hotty.
5/25/14 Helped the girls in the cast get their hair done
4/24/14 Surprised me with Italian on HER birthday
5/27/14 When I spent the night at the hotel for Military testing, I couldn't sleep. A mixture of excitement and anxiety came over me as I pondered how serious this commitment was. Kristina let me text her and call her on the phone. She said I could call her whenever I wanted and that she'd stay up with me as long as I needed her to. How supportive! Soldiers need that kind of support.
I have a lot of things going for me that will make me a solid soldier. But the best one is my wife.
When I had to travel for military testing, I couldn't fall asleep at the hotel because of how exciting and nerve-racking the reality of my enlistment is becoming.
My wife sacrificed her sleep to stay up talking to me and reassuring me, and was willing to pull an all-nighter to help me fall asleep. I mean it when I say I can't do it without my wife.
6/5/14 Yesterday was a sweet day. Kristina said I must have had a hard day at work, so she took us to Provo Towne Mall and got us Latino food. Then we went to FYE and bought movies. She bought me two movies I had wanted: Catching Fire and Zero Dark Thirty. She bought three other DVDs: First season of Chicago Fire, Sound of Music, and James and the Giant Peach. She spent $60 altogether. I felt bad, but Kristina sweetly insisted and said she wanted me to have some fun and that it was my turn to be treated to gifts and that I deserved it. Kristina and I were in a great mood.
Then I installed her shower head.
Surprised me with this text on Memorial Day:
(1/2) Look outside the window, sun rising for u, flowers smiling for u, birds singing 4 u, b'coz last night I told them to wish you u good morning!
Love you bu (2/2) tter cup! :)
6/7/14 Surprised me with the following:
A few days ago, bought me Hunger Games and Zero Dark Thirty at the FYE in the Provo Towne Mall
Today, bought me Catching Fire at Barnes and Noble while I was doing exit interviews at Best Buy on behalf of Bestmark.
Journal, Thursday, June 19, 2014, 7:08 am Last night Kristina and I had Spicy Thai for dinner. We watched 17 Again. She helped me do pushups and sit ups for basic training. She did some of those, plus jumping Jack's, stretches, and other exercises. I don't know what it is, but Kristina looks attractive when she exercises.
I should mention that Kristina enjoyed teasing me, tickling me, biting my bum and pulling my pants down, all the while telling me I couldn't laugh. She pushed me, literally and figuratively, and didn't let me take breaks. She would make a great drill Sergeant.
7/2/14 Surprised me at work by bringing me a sausage, egg and cheese sandwich.
7/6/14 Owned up to the fact that having another credit card drove her further into debt. Canceled one of the cards, and used her birthday money to pay off most of the credit card. She now sees why it's important to have a budget. She's going to work extra shifts to pay off the cancelled card. She is wasting no time in fixing it.
7/7/14 Gave a sweet testimony in church yesterday. She normally didn't like going up, so I thought it was awesome that she did yesterday (she's done it the past couple months). She talked about how she thought about leaving the church, but when she prayed like her friend Heidi told her, she felt peace.
Kristina said she felt bad that she sometimes didn't come to our ward (usually it was to go to her parents' ward or her friend's ward).
I thought it was neat when she said she felt the Spirit while Carrie Underwood sang How Great Thou Art along with another religious themed song.
11/27/13 Hugged me extra close this morning. We laughed.
I love that she works hard to do her part.
Last night, she worked hard to clean up the kitchen and living room. I helped by doing laundry.
12/8/13 Has given me multiple second chances to improve.
12/20/13 I love going to weddings with her and reminiscing on our wedding.
I have noticed that she has done a good job recognizing my talents, my progress, and acknowledging why I'm angry.
1/7/14 The stories of her growing up touch my heart. She was an adorable kid.
Talking to her about money is a million times easier than it was a year ago.
2/23/14 Rehearsed my lines with me for an audition for Midsummer Night's Dream. She laughed with me at how ridiculous some of the lines were
Took me to see the Lego movie
Recognized that I was starting to get grouchy. So she volunteered to put away the groceries and insisted that I go to bed.
3/21/14 Takes her tablet with her to Wendy's so that I can watch Netflix or listen to Pandora when I visit her.
Dutifully runs errands for us during her free time.
3/28/14 woke up at 4 am to take me to work.
4/10/14 Made a fruit smoothie with our blender, put aluminium foil over it, and brought it to me for work; that was a nice surprise
4/13/14 Secretly wrote "I love you" in my green journal. That made me choke up.
4/21/14 Put Neosporin on my ear to make it up to me after playing too roughly with my ear.
4/24/14 She had us watch Heaven is for Real. I loved cuddling, laughing, and crying with her during the movie. It was a sweet reminder of how much she means to me. I want Kristina forever.
9/25/13 she is my defendant, ally, advocate, and spokesperson. When people are rude or unfair to me, she sticks up for me and often gets me freebies.
9/30/13 helped me get ready for work this morning. Made sure that I specifically got the microwave dinner she bought me.
She makes me feel loved and needed each morning. She does this by hugging me tightly, refusing to let go, and playfully insisting I stay home from work.
10/03/13 Has been supportive of me during my furlough. She has reassured me of her love through wOrds, and she has happily agreed to spend less. She has also helped me think of jobs to look for and apply for them
10/8/13 I loved going to an interview with Kristina yesterday. That was a special family memory. I loved how she brought me my razor (so I could shave) and hair clippers (so Natalie could cut my hair).
10/10/13 texted me wishing me luck on my interview
10/13/14 told me I smelled good, looked hot
Dropped me off at church. I had planned on walking home, but it turned out she was outside Elder's quorum waiting for me.
Texted me to wish me luck on my first day on the job. When I came home, she ran up to me and gave me a tight hug.
10/24/2013
She gave me compliments on my good looks. She wrote me a note saying that I was awesome and thanked me for listening to her fears about starting phlebotomy training. She says she loves having me there to reassure her.
10/29/13 has become proficient at phlebotomy. Drew blood from me and I hardly felt a thing.
11/2/13 cleaned up around the house to show she was sorry. She gave me $4 on case I needed it when I hung out with Mark and Spencer.
11/12/13 here's part of an email I sent her:
I'm proud of you for graduating phlebotomy. I'm confident you can find a job. I know you will love it.
I'm grateful for the time we spent yesterday. I loved flirting with you at your work. Thank you for bringing me lemon water. I'm eternally grateful for your companionship, friendship, and help. We make a great team!
I'm honored to have you as my eternal companion. I will happily work on my flaws so that I'm easier to deal with.
You are beautiful inside and out.
Love,
Kevin
I also loved playing the piano and singing primary songs with you yesterday. You fulfilled my dream of having a wife I could play music with :-)
Things I appreciate about Kristina part 3
7/22/13 Borrowed weird Al albums from the library and said I got her into them.
7/24/13 Watched me run the temple. to 5k, drove me to donate blood ( rested her hand on my foot to comfort me) and took care of me when I felt sick (put a cold towel on my head, rubbed my tummy, and put her arm around me)
7/29/13 Usually I make my own lunch for work. But Kristina made it for me last night. She also got us to bed early and insisted that I get some extra rest.
We laughed almost the entire day yesterday.
We read People magazine together. When she read summer of it on her own, she let me read some Sherlock Holmes.
7/30/13 She is as affectionate as I am. We both feel a special kind of bonding and healing when we cuddle or hug. This is one
of the main reasons I decided to marry her.
8/1/13 Is better at hiding, finding, and remembering stuff than I am.
8/4/13 has gotten me into a lot if fun stuff: karaoke, country, Bacheleorette, people magazine
8/6/13 Her skin is warm and mine is usually cold. We both love touching each other because she gets to cool out while I warm up.
8/9/13 stood by my side when my tire got a flat. We met at my work and we started to drive home, but my Pontiac's spare tire started rattling. Kristina saw me pull over to tighten it, so she pulled over, too, and helped me find the nearest Big O Tires. More than anything, she gave me her emotional support by being there.
She drove behind me in her Hyundai with her emergency lights and signaled for people to steer clear of me.
8/11/13 Shares the gospel with friends and with new people we meet. Usually she's the one to initiate a conversation aboutthe church.
8/13/13 Went voting with me.
8/16/13 Rushed me to the BYU bookstore so I could get Macbeth.
Bought me a hotdog at Costco
8/16/13 Found me while I was at the recreation center. She looked for me on all the treadmills and in the bathrooms. I laughed and was touched. I was in the lobby the whole time.
Found an awesome app for keeping a grocery list: "Out of milk"
8/19/13 Last year, when she visited California with her dad, she kept a journal of notes to me. I reread them and it was fun to relive that memory.
6/27/13 She is my eye candy. drop dead gorgeous
Has made it a point lately to say more nice things about me in front of other people.
6/28/13 Let me have time alone in the bath tub to chill off and prevent further arguments.
6/29/13 She also made spaghetti using Angel hair pasta, my favorite noodle.
6/30/13 Remembered at the last minute, when I completely forgot, that I had to play the organ. she rushed through traffic (i jokingly told her I'm glad she broke the law for me), dropped me off at the door, and looked for parking while I ran in. I was mad at myself for forgetting, but I'm grateful my wife was on the ball.
Complimented my organ music multiple times.
Says that she wouldn't be able to live without me.
Thought of the best idea for making genealogy interesting for kids: genealogy bingo! Using Reese pieces, gummy bears, pb m&ms, or other candy as tokens or prizes
Comes from a strong happy family. That's a big part of the reason why I wanted to marry her even when I didn't want to marry her.
7/2/13 Just before passing Beaver on our way to St. George, she volunteered to take the wheel. I admired how easily she merged. She is becoming a great freeway driver!
Called Grandma in a sweet voice to let her know we were in Ceder City.
7/6/13 Hit the golf balls at the St George driving range even though she never took classes. She did better than me at first. Made a funny joke: we could each imagine each other's faces on the golf balls and whack then to smithereens.
Has made time to let me read.
7/7/13 Apologized profusely for our arguments over money.
At the hotel, got me my favourite breakfast foods: waffles with strawberries with whip cream, oatmeal with brown sugar, orange juice, bagel with Strawberry cream cheese and biscuits and gravy.
7/9/13 Hugs me tightly and kisses me profusely before I leave for work each morning. makes me feel love and wanted.
Frequently visits me at work. Waits for me patiently outside the hallway. Sometimes scours the whole building looking for me.
Is outspoken and charming. We have received many freebees because of this quality.
7/10/13 Let me go home early from karaoke so I could sleep. She was quiet when she came home. She apologized for making noise, even though it didn't bother me. She also put an extra blanket over me to make me warm and tucked it tightly around me.
7/12/13 I took the love languages test and realized my language was Acts of Service. After looking through these two ongoing lists of this I appreciate about her, I realize she has already been speaking my love language loud and clear.
Based on what I've written, she has done:
10 Acts of Service
9 encouraging words
3 times hasyouched me physically I'm ways I appreciate
5 times spent time with me and I appreciated it.
4 times has given me a gift of some sort
And this has just been over the past month. I'm sure all of these numbers will increase dramatically if I was to look overt the whole year we've been together.
7/13/13 Watched me at the ward. 5k. She did the walking race. When I finished I ran back and walked with her. Was proud that I finished 3rd. She has no idea how much it meant for me to see her there.
7/15/13 After a nasty fight over money, she diffused the argument by saying she understands why I'm frustrated with her spending habits, that she knows I want my financial sacrifices to be appreciated, and that she was sorry for embarrassing me at the store. She has made it a point lately to validate my feelings and show compassion for how I feel. Bless her.
Tells me almost everyday she misses me, even if we're only apart for an hour.
7/16/13 Uses her when money to pay for extra snacks she wants and that are not on the grocery list.
7/17/13 Left me a sweet note thanking me for being a wonderful husband. She also reminded me to laugh more than get mad, which is good advice. The note was from a book of notes with animal pictures.
7/18/13 I had a long list of things I needed to accomplish this week and Kristina has helped me accomplish a significant portion of them.
Last night, unpacked a box from the move that still had stuff in it.
Thought on her own how I should work tomorrow (6/11/13) instead of going to the movie with her. She told me she appreciates how hard I work to support our family.
she suggested buying fewer things in order to save money, even though they were on sale. Bought me surprise gifts for father's day
6/15/13 When I started puking on the ride at the carnival, Kristina yelled at the top of her lungs to the operators to stop the ride. she yelled multiple times as loud as she could. they didn't hear her, but it touched me to hear her like a soldier screaming for aid for a wounded comrade. She is a soldier with fortitude.
6/16/13 Treated me to sizzlers for father's day. at first I was mad because I was worried about getting sick and I just wanted to enjoy a meal that Kim and Ned made. Also, I didn't feel right abou.t eating out on Sunday. but she paid for it out of her own pocket. For her, it was a selfless sacrifice. plus, I got leftovers for lunch tomorrow. If I get sick, I'll be treated by the most gorgeous and helpful nurse in the world.
6/17/13 Plays the piano. We can share that music together and work on songs together as husband and wife. She also has a nice voice to go with my piano. Admires my talents.
had me switch from iPhone to HTC One. the HTC is about 1,000 times better than the iPhone.
6/19/13 Cuddles with me in bed. I don't know what it is, but hugging her and cuddling with her make me feel warm inside. It's therapeutic and relieves stress. It makes my love for her, grow more profoundly than anything else.
The following story still makes me want to cry happy tears when I read it (6/23/13) A couple months ago, I texted her saying my fruit that I had grabbed for breakfast weren't very good. She showed up at my work a few minutes later with sliced apples and fruit dip. I wanted to weep for joy when she did that because a) it was unexpected b) she had to work at 10, and came to my work at 9:30 meaning she had a time crunch, which means she made time just to make sure I had a good breakfast. c) with time being short, she still sliced the apples and put some of the dip in the container.
It was so simple, yet it was profoundly meaningful to me. It is one of my favorite memories of us as newlyweds.end of story
She put windshield washer fluid in her car well I put radiator fluid in my car. The fact that we did it at the same time whats a cute thing for a couple to do. That was actually a cute thing for us to do, a great date idea. It was like a picture of a perfect American family.
6/21/13 She is quick to apologize. It's anxious to learn and improve herself. Is determined not to let her slight learning disability get her down.
Is not jealous. Not embarrassed easily.
Paid for dinner at Spicy Thai yesterday. She splurged and got three things: a free pot sticker appitizer and masman curry, pineapple yellow curry and tom kai soup (which is a really good coconut milk soup) She had nearly $ 800 in the bank and could afford that. I am so proud of her for getting the hang of spending and her celebrating it unselfishly
6/23/13 memorized "I'll go where you want me to go". We both could sing that without the hymnal.
6/24/13 Whenever I find out the real reason why I'm angry (i.e. that I feel unappreciated or overwhelmed) she hugs me and assures me that she appreciates me and offers to help.
You can lead a horse to water but can't make it drink. Kristina usually drinks deeply from the water, as long as she is led lovingly and gently. She'll even go back when you're notlooking.
Visits me at work. Her visits are a boost to my mind and spirit, and they are the highlight of my day. She's not embarrassed to kiss me in front of my co-workers.
If she ever has to use our American Express credit card, she reports it to me right away. She makes sure to hardly ever use it at all.
Offered to go Dutch at dinner to alleviate the cost.
6/25/13 Is quick to apologize, even when there's nothing to apologize for
Is anxious to learn how to drive on the freeway. She loves to use the cruise control. She has done a marvelous job getting the hang of freeway driving.
She winked at me in the temple in her adorable way! :)
Going to the temple First thing in the morning was her idea. she knew it would make me happy to go to the temple. We decided to go once a month. the morning is my favorite time of the day to go to the temple And she picked the perfect time n
After we get in arguments, I often find her in our room reading the scriptures, praying, or researching on the internet how to make it up to me.
Told Nixon to be nice to me. He was being a little due to me. She firmly stopped him and told him to be nice.
6/26/13 When I was upstairs stewing over an argument, she made a tasty breakfast: eggs with cheese and apples with peanut butter. This reminded me of the angel I have, and the treasure that's worth fighting for.
6/27/13 It's easier for me to write a list of things I love about her. I have to think really hard to come up with a list of things about her that bug me.
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